Kate’s solo parenthood story

There are so many ways to start and grow a family and for many their journey involves exploring fertilkity treatment options, like IVF. Here Kate shares her solo parenthood journey and why she chose the Access Fertility IVF Multi-Cycle Programme.

Making parenthood possible

For years, while she was busy studying and building a career, Kate had dreamed of becoming a mother.  By her thirties, Kate had come to view solo motherhood through IVF as an attractive option and an opportunity to build the family she had always wanted.

“I had it in my mind that I wasn’t leaving this planet without being a mum,” says Kate, 37, from Northampton.

Like many women considering solo parenthood, Kate was aware that time was passing.  She didn’t want to miss her chance to become a mother simply because she hadn’t met the right partner.  

Although Kate did not know anyone personally who had pursued IVF as a solo mum, she knew it was the best choice for her. After initial tests through the NHS, she chose Care Fertility Northampton, where she learned about Access Fertility’s Multi-Cycle Programme which allows multiple cycles of cost-effective IVF.

“The multi-cycle programme sounded brilliant, and I trusted Access Fertility because it was recommended by the clinic.  All the information was clearly laid out and accessible.  I received responsive support when I contacted with queries and there were no hidden costs,” she explains.

Investing in a dream

As she was privately funding the treatment, one of Kate’s initial concerns was the financial commitment involved. However, she found the process much more manageable than expected. Through a combination of personal savings and support from her parents, she was able to fund her treatment and repay the fees interest-free within a year.  “The Access Fertility programme allowed me to pay back the costs without gaining debt.  They were very good and I would definitely recommend,” said Kate.

Support and peace of mind

Looking back, Kate feels the practical aspects of treatment were far less daunting than she had imagined.  Kate continues, “There are always apprehensions before you start, but everything was so straightforward and well organised.  I felt supported throughout.”

That support extended beyond the clinic and Access Fertility. Kate was surrounded by family, friends and colleagues who embraced her decision.  “My colleagues at work feel they are part of the journey,” she says.  “Their encouragement helped make the experience even more positive and reinforced the fact that she was never truly doing it alone”.

Kate describes her IVF journey as a remarkably special experience. During treatment, seven eggs were collected, and five fertilised.  One of the highlights was receiving updates from the embryology team.  “They would send me videos of them growing in the lab incubator. It was amazing,” explains Kate.

As with many IVF journeys, there were emotional moments. Kate hoped that some embryos could be preserved for the possibility of future siblings but only one was reported to be good at the five day mark.  This brought an element of disappointment and uncertainty. However, those difficult moments were quickly overshadowed by exciting news.

Welcome to the world

After embryo transfer, Kate was advised to wait 17 days before taking a pregnancy test.  “I couldn’t wait,” she laughs. “After five days I did a test and it was positive. I did several tests after that too!”

Kate became pregnant on her very first IVF cycle, and in May 2025, she welcomed her daughter, Isla, into the world.

Kate looks back on the journey with genuine affection. “My IVF journey was magical, even in the difficult moments. I wish I could go back and relive it all again.”

Pregnancy itself was a wonderful experience for Kate, as she explains, “I loved being pregnant and I felt more comfortable in my skin than ever before. I felt great. I was buzzing. I wish I’d done it years ago!”

Building family life

Since Isla’s arrival, Kate has embraced motherhood wholeheartedly.  While adjusting to life with a newborn, her support network stepped up.  Friends arrived with prepared meals to stock the freezer, helped care for baby Isla and created opportunities for Kate to rest and adjust to motherhood.

The practical and emotional support around her reinforced the belief that families come in many forms.  For Kate, becoming a mother felt completely natural. “I always felt like I was just waiting to be a mum.”

Over the past year, she and Isla have built a wonderful life together. From walks and picnics in the park to trips to the zoo and holidays with Isla’s grandparents, they have created countless memories.  “We’ve got a busy life together, but we also enjoy the quieter moments at home,” enthuses Kate.

Recently, Isla celebrated her first birthday with a garden party surrounded by family and friends. With sunshine, a paddling pool and a ball pit, it was a day filled with love and laughter, and a fitting celebration.

Challenging misconceptions about solo mums

One unexpected outcome of her journey has been the number of people who now approach her for advice. Both socially and at work, people considering fertility treatment regularly ask Kate about her experience, and there’s no doubt that her experiences are an inspiration for others.

Kate chose to use an anonymous sperm donor and speaks warmly about the person who helped make her dream possible.  “I don’t know him and I don’t even know how I’d tell him how grateful I am.”

Her openness and positivity are helping to challenge outdated perceptions about solo parenthood.  “There is a widely held belief that single families are less than, but I’ve been thinking about being a mum my whole life, so how can you ever be less than?” shares Kate.

She believes many women can be held back by worrying about what others might think. “The reason I didn’t do it years ago was because I had other people’s opinions in my head.

Today, however, those doubts have disappeared.  I’m so focused on this little person that she will never go without.”

Kate is proud of her journey and the family she has created. “I’m very proud about it. Any nerves and worries that I had before, I don’t have now. People are really fascinated by my story.”

Inspiring others

There’s lots of resources out there for parents of donor conceived children and best practice, which Kate encourages people to access.  “As our situation is unique, we need to do what’s best for our children, by listening learning and being open and honest. As parents we should support them as individuals however we are able to by being aware, acknowledging all parts of them are significant and being open to explore this however they wish to,” says Kate.

For anyone considering IVF as a solo parent, Kate’s message is, “Don’t just wait.  If you want to become a mum, go for it. It’s the best thing ever and I would do it exactly the same again.”

For Kate, pursuing IVF as a solo mum was a route to parenthood that she had always dreamed of.  Looking back, she sees a journey that was far more positive, straightforward and rewarding than she imagined, and importantly it has been the start of her role as mum to her daughter Isla.